July 11: Sunny Sunday

It was a Sunday. You went out, I went out. We went our hearts on solitary way, or so I thought. I was alone but I'm not lonely. You weren't alone after all. You have a ride. Every time you go out, you'd have a ride or a companion in that matter. If you don't have a companion, that when you'd call me of course. I know. I kind of understood my role in your life and I have taught myself not to expect too much already.

In case you'd ask, do I miss you? Of course, I do. Every day. But I will have myself tend to my own wounds rather than have you realize I'm bleeding every day and just be oblivious about it. That would hurt even more. You go get busy with everything that is pleasing in your eyes and mood. I don't have the luxury of all the good energies to feed to a negative one. Someone who does not care how I feel. Someone who stays silent forever.

I'm staying because I don't have a good reason to let go and after all, I am not a quitter. I won't quit on someone I have had the compassion for at one point in my life - especially when we both had agreed to it. I am distant because I was tired of getting hurt every day.

I needed my time to heal.